The latest marketing challenge has been the pain relieving vaginal suppository, FORIA. The falsely dubbed “cannabis tampon” hit the market after much anticipation. The confusion that followed took an interesting turn.
The original marketing campaign likened the vaginal pain relief suppositories unto tampons in relation to insertion, not purpose. However, some genius along the way decided to call them “cannabis tampons”.
Low And Behold, The Nickname Stuck.
One video went so far as to use an actual tampon for demonstration. Really? I’m pretty sure that band of tools didn’t even bother reading up on the product… even a little.
First Off, The Area Of Insertion Is The ONLY Similarity Between The Two.
Yes, both are used inside the vaginal canal during menstruation. One is absorbent, one is absorbed. Other than that, and the ability to make life tolerable, the similarities end there.
The FORIA Relief Cannabis Tampon Are, In Fact, (Hold Your Breath) Suppositories. Gasp!
In essence, these are used in the same method as traditional suppositories. It is recommended they are refrigerated for at least 15 minutes prior to use. This will solidify the compound so as to maintain solidity until inserted. They are inserted into the vaginal canal (not the rectum). The cocoa butter and cannabis combination melts when subjected to mild temperature increase.
Once it melts it is absorbed into the system never to be seen again.
Very Much Unlike A Tampon.
Please, do not attempt to insert the FORIA Relief Suppositories into the rectum. They are for vaginal use only. I can’t say it would be bad for you. I would have to ask why would you? I’m sure there’s going to be that ONE asshole…
The general idea behind the initial tampon reference was to denote location of insertion.
The definition of a tampon per dictionary.com is: -A plug of cotton or the like for insertion into an orifice, wound etc., chiefly for absorbing blood or stopping hemorrhages.
The definition of a suppository per dictionary.com is:
-A conical mass of medicinal substance that melts upon insertion into the rectum or vagina.
Clearly, There Is A Distinct Difference.
Over the course of a few days the “cannabis tampon” label took hold like a bird of prey takes a mouse. The unsuspecting product was nabbed by the progenitor of the label. From there it was whisked it off to serve to the the hungry nest of starving offspring.
Yes, it is distasteful imagery, isn’t it. And “weed tampon” is better how, exactly?
There has been an overwhelming response to the term “weed tampon”. The company had to adjust their product’s internet search buzzwords to fit the new demand. FORIA Relief Vaginal Suppositories, while not actually tampons, now acknowledges the nickname.
I did a search on the phrase “weed tampons”. The first thing that popped up was the actual product for which I was searching.
I Kind Of Want To Be Troubled By This.
It’s rather irritating for me, personally when people are misinformed. We are in an age where our mobile devices come with voice recognition. Google can find even the most menial of memes and sickeningly adorable kittens. Surely, it can be used for information as well.
I’m sure it was not a far jump from cannabis suppository cannabis tampon in light of the deterioration of the quality of information being passed off as journalism.
Why would anyone make such a ridiculously ignorant and misleading video as aforementioned?
I asked that question myself. When I am given an assignment, even one such as this, I do my research. I make sure that the information I’m passing on is an informed declaration. Nay, I leave the making it up as I go for casual conversation and misdirectional purposes. Honesty and truth supported by research and Inquisition.
How Did This Go So Pear Shaped?
The only remotely – albeit very fuzzy logic – viable explanation was plain ignorance. It is easy for people to want to cash in on the sensationalism of the product.
It is equally easy for them to put a half-assed attempt to do research.
It’s much easier to assume the facts and pray no one cares enough to research further.
Assumption is the mother of all fuck ups.
Where we went wrong is listening to the media in the first place. We cannot expect to be given all of the scoop on any one subject. There are bound to be things left out when one does not get the information ”straight from the horse’s mouth”, so to speak.
I Hate Tampons…
Once a month I almost wish I were a man. Almost. If tampons could disappear as with a suppository, life would be friggin awesome.
However, I am a realist.
It ain’t happening. As a woman, I am beyond the whole “joy of womanhood” bull shit. If I can make it through the whole month not being forced to wear prison orange, I’m good.
Cramps are a fact of life for millions of women. Men have no idea what it’s like for us. Half the time, guys, we don’t know what to expect either. It can feel like someone has a vice grip on your insides.
The average cycle is from 3-7 days. One can start experiencing cramping days before actually starting.
Each woman is different. No two women will have the same exact experience with their cycle.
Same thing with cramps.
They can range from mild discomfort to gut-wrenching agony. Either way, it sucks. Processing chemical remedies can be hard hard on the liver.
This Product Is Not Ingested Orally (Though The Mouth).
It does not need to pass through the liver before entering the bloodstream. There is no messy cleanup. Well, no.. nevermind.
Anyway, NOT being actually anything even remotely close to a tampon, this needs to stop. Cannabis plug is better than Cannabis tampon any day. There has to be a better name for it. Oh, how about… FORIA Vaginal Pain Relief Suppository. Sounds good to me!